Friday, December 9, 2005

Because I don't drive

I have never had a driver's license; this has been somewhat a strain on Cliff's love for me, since it requires his taking me to the grocery store, to the doctor, and other necessary places.  But after almost forty years, he's used to it.  He makes sure he has some reading material along to make the time pass faster while he waits for me.

Throughout the years, I've often been asked, "What will you do if something happens to Cliff?"

In the last ten years or so, I've come up with an answer, and it is, indeed, my plan, should Cliff die before I do:  I'll sell this place and everything on it and move to senior citizen housing in a town fifteen miles from here.  The apartments there are close to the grocery store and the library, and there are plenty of churches I could attend.  My doctor's office is there.  I'd have my computer, and I'd be fine.

Once I had decided on this plan, I worried no more; and I had an answer for that inevitable question everyone asks when they find out I don't drive.

However, last weekend I found out Cliff's younger sister doesn't like this plan.  She's sure I'd be miserable without my cabin and the horse, and my country home.  She doesn't realize that without Cliff, this place would mean nothing to me... not to mention the fact that it would go back to brush and weeds, which is how much of it was when we acquired it.  It takes a lot of money for upkeep on a farm, even a hobby farm.  Money a widow wouldn't have.

I lived in apartments in Kansas City for over three years, between my graduation and my marriage.  I was content, except I wished for someone to love me.  But I don't mind living in the city, or a small town, or any environment, really.  There are pretty sunrises and sunsets anywhere you go.

Back to Cliff's sister:  she and her husband live in a house on an acreage in the country, and she has decided I must move in with them, should poor Cliff die first (he was listening to all this, and getting rather distressed that we were making plans for his untimely demise).  She refuses to see me living in a cramped-up apartment in town.

There are a couple of things wrong with her idea:  First of all, the only way I'd get along with anyone living in the same house is if I had my own seperate quarters;  I'm a slob, and I need my space.  But here's the kicker:  Charlene, although she's fourteen years younger than I am, has severe asthma.  She barely makes it through each winter.  If I were a betting person, I'd wager that I'll outlive her.

But you know, it makes me feel good that someone is that concerned about me.

Meanwhile, Cliff wonders what everyone knows that he doesn't, since we all seem to be forseeing his death.

20 comments:

bhbner2him said...

OH, what a hoot!  Here's hoping you and Cliff live a long, healthy life together and then pass away at nearly the same time so that you nor he has to cross that bridge.  But I suppose that might be a hard one on the ones left behind.  Guess it's just better that we don't know, heh?  -  Barbara

pudge450 said...

So, why don't you drive?

lv2trnscrb said...

I think it is an excellent idea to move into town and into a senior citizens place when the time is right. In my neighborhood there are lots of elderly people with big houes living by themselves. They have people come in to do their lawn and snow blowers or people to shovel their snow. I often think "wouldn't it be easier to move where someone will take care of those needs as part of your room and board and you would have people around when you want them?" That's what I would do if I was left with that decision and still living here.

betty

firestormkids04 said...

Poor Cliff!  Has he made a plan as well?  Or prefer not to think about those possibilities?  I guess even with all the planning we do in our heads, we will never be ready for the death of our loved one.  Your idea is a solid one and probably the best for you.  Blessings, Penny http://journals.aol.com/firestormkids04/FromHeretoThere

vortexgirl said...

Aweeeee, poor Cliff.  Does he have any plans if you leave first?  You should see that he has a plan as well.   If not it might include something young and shiny.  ;)
Dianne

annalisa135 said...

Oh poor Cliff!  I can  understand you wanting to be prepared though.  It sounds like you've given it a lot of thought, and know exactly what you want and need, that is all that matters.

When you wrote about living in your apartment, and being content, except for wishing for someone to love you -- I can understand all too well.  I've been wishing to be loved for longer than I can recall.  I hope and pray my day truly comes.  If only it would.

love, Anna

marainey1 said...

I don't have that option and haven't for years as I need to work and therefore need to drive.  I'd love to find a job close enough to walk to, but that hasn't happened yet and where we live, there are no closeby grocery stores, only a gas station.  You have been fortunate in not having to drive, it's a big expense.  Once again, I will repeat my self and say how lucky you are that the good Lord has blessed you in so many ways!  'On Ya' - ma

ksquester said...

The rumors of Cliffs untimely demise have been greatly exagurated. haaaaaaa  I have found the secret in aging is the ability to adapt. Another one is to always have friends younger than you....keeps you on your toes. I have NO doubt that you will do fine wherever you are planted!   Anne

zosche973 said...

Oh my goodness-poor Cliff! lol No, really, it's good your thinking ahead, but for the time being-enjoy eachother now! ~Diane~

zosche973 said...

I forgot the add-I'd be lost without a car! But my grandma never drove, and she did just fine all her life-but it's never too late to learn! ~Diane~

sanforized6 said...

I'm with Cliff!! I like your original plan. Why should you "have" to do anything other than what you want, when the time comes? You've more than earned the right to make your own decision. BUT, let's hang with Cliff, OK? rich

lordofbutter said...

Cliff rules. Your original plan is much better, I think.

When I first started driving I decided to teach my (at the time) 72 year old granny how to drive....

one lesson later. I stopped. I think it was more for fun...bad I know.

And hey congrats on getting picked by Robin!

deslily said...

if it happens that Cliff leaves before you... Live Alone!!!.. i can tell you that living with someone else, no matter they love you or not.. it's horrid mainly living in your bedroom where it becomes the only place where anything of yours is around you!  I've done this 6 yrs now...and i can't begin to tell you how you start to feel like you don't even exist... LIVE ALONE!!... but for now.. keep your guy healthy so you don't have to make any decisions like that!!

msecz said...

Oh Poor Cliff.... I hope he found something in all this to laugh about but then its serious business and when he heard your plans it probably put his mind at ease too and you both will live a long time not worrying about such things... :) Sometimes I wish I didn't know how to drive as it makes me so nervous sometimes with so much traffic these days.... I try to go places when I know the traffic won't be so bad. Your plan sounds very nice to me too. If my son ever leaves home that is probably what I will do too. Sandra

ravenlark2 said...

You do what you want to do. If that includes living in an apartment, then go for it. Least you now finally have an answer to that question but....can Cliff stay around for a little while longer? He's so nice to have there. Besides....you're not really ready to give up the farm yet are ya? (No doubt he's not either.. hehehehe)

{{{Hugs}}}

-Raven

bnanajm said...

Well if the room at Charlene's doesn't work out or the apartment at The Shady Rest is not OK, there's always your room at "Jakie's house".

XXOO
Joanna

mutualaide said...

My apologies but as I was reading I had a chuckle.  Poor Cliff!  You have a good plan for yourself and no matter what anyone else says, stick to your own plan.   You'll be happier that way.  

siennastarr said...

Poor Cliff!  But.. it is the inevitable!  We all have to go sometime!

Jackie

csandhollow said...

Ilike your plan.

simwarford said...

Even though I'd prefer to go first, I promised D I'd go last. Of course, that may not be a promise I can keep!