Tuesday, July 8, 2008

The worst thing about being 64

I received a phone call a while ago from Cliff's younger sister.  She had just gotten off the phone with an aunt and learned that a cousin, Ellen, died yesterday.

We last saw Ellen in February when we attended a birthday party for the much-beloved Aunt Gertrude.

Not long before that, in January, we attended Ellen's mom's funeral.

Ellen was diabetic.  She needed heart surgery, but her blood sugar was too high; so the doctors sent her home to try and get her blood sugar down.  That's where she died.

I called Cliff at work to tell him.  "We just saw her at Aunt Gertrude's birthday party," I told him.

"That's how we're all going to go, Babe," Cliff said.

"Well, I suppose so; you tried to go two years ago, but the doctors prevented that."

He chuckled, and we said our goodbyes.

And that's what I hate about being this age; cousins start dying like flies.

A person can be the worst spoiled brat in the world and have very few "people skills", but her cousins accept her, because they have to.  Friends scatter and disappear, but cousins reappear in your life over and over.  Even if only at funerals.  Even if they perhaps remind you that you used to scratch their arms with your long fingernails when you scuffled with them back in 1955.

Except for one special-needs cousin on Mother's side and one on my dad's side (Cecil Wayne), I still have most of my cousins; and I don't want to lose more, any time soon.   But it's started.

OK, I'm depressed.  There's no need to make everybody else feel sad; I'll be back tomorrow with something more upbeat.

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fierrorachel said...

I love you Mom!  I'm just sayin'.

marainey1 said...

My sincerest sympathies to you.  I know the feeling well.  I was younger than you when I lost my first cousin. The circle of life goes on and on and on...  Hugs and prayers,

helmswondermom said...

You may remember that I wrote about this subject a while back.  I have so many first cousins, and many of them are 20+ years older than I am, so I actually lost a few of them when I was still a child.  But now the ones that are closer to me in age, and ones that I used to see often when I was younger are starting to go, and at relatively young ages, too, and it is very hard to come to terms with.  I know just how you are feeling right now.

lmitc89854 said...

Sorry about your cousin. I have only lost one so far as I know.  I am leaving tomorrow to take my mothers ashes back to Canada and will be attending a "cousin's" get to gether on Friday. My Aunt says there will be over 55 people there. Hope I recognize some of them!  

csandhollow said...

too many deaths lately for all of us I think.

lisa41076 said...

Awwwwww do'nt be depressed hon, I wish I shared my birthday with Jorja, Hugs Lisa

ryanagi said...

I've always said that death is worse for those left living...because we are reminded that our own turn will come (not to mention having to carry on without the one who is gone.)  And the older you get, the sooner that might be.  That IS a depressing thought. But we can't enjoy life much if all we think about is when it will end.  Hope the clouds lift soon Donna.    

jawojnar said...

Sorry to hear about your cousin.

mutualaide said...

My feelings exactly Donna.  My cousin Tom passed last week and I'm just feeling very down about it.  Getting old isn't bad ... but the people passing on part is.  :(

nanlynska said...

Sorry to hear of your loss Donna. It is hard to give 'em up. I have cousins passing all too often lately, too. At least we have the fond memories.

I always just pray that they are ready to meet their creator. That's the most important part of living.....being ready to 'go' when God calls us home.

countrylady4071 said...

Happy belated Birthday to you Donna!!!  I'm glad you had a great day.  I enjoyed your pictures of your family.  Wow, it looks like you did a lot of cooking.  I bet everyone enjoyed that good old "home cooking."  I'm sorry your cousin passed away.  My thoughts and prayers are with you.

bnanajm said...

There is one thing worse than being 64 and that's being 70.  Expecially when you KNOW FOR SURE that on the inside is a 30 year old, trapped for eternity.

I love you even when you're depressed Donna.

Chiquita Bnana

tendernoggle said...

I am so very sorry for yall's loss...I was thinking the other day of how many loved ones have come into and now gone from my life...one of the downsides of growing old...I am praying that the good Lord brings peace and comfort to you and Cliff...
God bless,

ora4uk said...

I know just exactly where you are Mosie....and know how you are feeling too....being 70 and the youngest of the family .... well let's just say..."there ain't many left out there"!!!!  God Bless...hugs...Ora      

skisseberth said...

Sad to hear of the passing...   ::hug::  [[[[[[[[Donna]]]]]]]]. God Bless you all.

siennastarr said...

Sorry for your loss, Donna..

I agree, though.. it's seems the older we get the more we lose family and friends.  I remember my mother talking about how her family was dropping like flies.  They all seemed so 'old' to me then.  Now, I am them.. and I can relate to what my mother was talking about.

I know we gotta go there.....but, getting old sucks!


gen0507 said...

So sorry for your loss~


fowfies said...

So sorry your mood was so damp and dreary. I hope your feeling better today. Yesterday was Ians moms birthday. She would have been 62. I told him I still miss her, and he says yeah, me too, I dont think that ever goes away. Just try to remember happy times and it helps. Hugs, Kelly

breakaway1968 said...

It sure is scary getting older.  Being overweight prob makes my husband and I much older in years then we could be!  I think it's time to work on that too!  Always something!