Monday, April 25, 2005

an update, pictures, and a poem

I called the pharmacy and found out I can take antiacids; I just have to wait at least two hours after the Doxycycline.  Whew.

I went looking for mushrooms and saw not a sign of them.  But you can see in the above pictures that my time wasn't wasted.

At my meeting with J-land friends Saturday, someone mentioned toad-licking (or was it smoking?).  This reminded me of a poem I wrote in 1991, after reading an article in the Kansas City Star.  To read about licking toads, click here.  Anyhow, I sent the poem to my new friends, and Anne says I must blog it.  So, here it is, in all its glory:

LICKIN' TOADS
August, 1991 
(c) Donna Wood    
 
I've always read the papers, and I've read some funny stuff,
But I read something recently that struck me pretty rough:
It seems somebody figured out that toads will make you high.
You can lick 'em, or chop up their skin and smoke it, when it's dry.
The side effects are dangerous, but if you come through alive,
You can tell your friends you smoked a toad and, somehow, still survived.
The ordinary garden toad, they say, will get you by;
But that Colorado River Toad will really‹ make you fly!

I know it may sound funny, but I'd like to meet the guy
Who figured out that licking toads is going to make you high!
The first time he tried licking toads, had he had a couple drinks?
I wonder what he looks like, and I wonder how he thinks.    
He probably introduced his friends to the joys of licking toads;
Did they smear them with some jelly?  Did they try them alamode?
I s'pose one day somebody said, "This lickin' toads is grim; 
Let's kill the little fellas, and then we can smoke the skin! 

I'll bet they traveled near and far and searched the country through
Before they figured out that not just any toad would do.
One day, out in the Rockies, lickin' every toad he met,
Some weirdo hollered, "Over here's the best toad I've licked yet!"   
That poor old toad was popular:  they passed him all around.
The Colorado Spotted Toad was the best they'd ever found!
It's a psychedelic pleasure --- even better than LSD,
And with hop-toads running everywhere, you can have this thrill for free. 

Well, now it's made the papers, so the whole wide world will know,
And folks'll be lickin' and smokin' toad, anywhere you go.
You'll see them in the gardens, and in the middle of the roads
Pursuing that elusive high you can get from smokin' toad!   
Forget the crack and cocaine, and the marijuana, too.
That stuff is so expensive, when just any old toad will do.
It's a wonderful experience, a psychedelic thrill,
And the only little problem is, it could just get you killed!
 
 

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

You are so totally awesome. I love this poem, as it made me laugh out loud. Now, what about a "diry ole egg sucking dog?"  haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Anonymous said...

I have a native Tennessee wildflower garden and I add to it every year.  Jack in the Pulpit is one flower that does not want to grow for me, it must enjoy being left in the wild.  I loved the poem.  Oh by the way how come they don't sell morels (the mushrooms) in the store?  

Anonymous said...

Beautiful flowers and what a great poem.  Thanks for the real laugh

Anonymous said...

YUKK, I have never heard of licking and smoking toads. Guess I am behind the times huh according to the time you wrote your poem. You did a very good  job. It's a cute poem.  Pretty pictures. Glad you are going to be able to take the antiacids, but pleeeze lay off the toad thingy.LOL  Helen

Anonymous said...

Never heard of smokin' toads but I like your poem.  You are so talented.

Anonymous said...

The funniest Beavis and Butthead episode ever involved toad licking. Now the smoking part, I've never heard of that!

Anonymous said...

Thank you for the pictures and the funny toad poem!  

I hate to hear about your rash-I hope everything turns out well with it.

I found a tick on one of my dogs the other day-I'll have to start spraying the yard and watching out for them.  

Everything worked out pretty good with the drama teen-she even apologized and said she felt horrid about the way she acted and we got along great this weekend.  Dr. Jekyll and Ms. Hyde!  I'm sure we will have other moments, but at least this one is past.

I hope you have a great week and feel better very soon-Jeff