Thursday, December 2, 2004

My weirdest online friend

  I try very hard to make this journal interesting for people who wander in.  I've mostly stayed away from talking about my online life, preferring to share my real world.  Today I depart from that norm.                               


It must have been five or six years ago, back in the old Christian Seniors chat room I was a part of, that I met Xibanitum.  Xib introduced himself as Julian, a nineteen-year-old gay male.  It was obvious he was in the room to stir things up, and he certainly did that.  His outrageous profile alone was enough to get people started preaching:  He was a "Goth", he insinuated that he had sexy feelings toward cats, and he talked about Marilyn Manson a lot.
One of our favorite chat friends in the senior room died of cancer, and for some reason that prompted Xib to confess that "he" was actually a female named P**** (she asked me to take her real name out of this entry; I complied).  However, she wanted to be a gay male, and if finanaces hadn't prohibited her having a
sex change, she would BE a male.  Now, this still confuses me; if you are attracted to males, why wouldn't you just remain a female? 
Probably half the folks in the chat room ignored Xib, thinking she'd go away.  One old Texan insisted she was somebody else, using a new name.  Of those who acknowledged her, many tried to convert her.  I myself have tried to reason with her a few times, to no avail.  I finally gave up on that.  But I found her interesting to talk to, so we kept in touch after the old room closed down.  Actually she's been a better friend to me than some of the senior Christians; we've had our ups and downs, she's forgiven, and we've moved on.  I still wish she'd clean up that filthy profile, but it's hers to do what she wants with; I just don't read it now. 
Now in case some of you reading this think I'm a victim of a hoax, let me reassure you:  several of my friends have met Xib.  She is 100% real.  I have here on my desk a little keychain mechanical cat she sent me once, and I've sent her a post card or two at some point.  Oh, and when she reads this entry, she will lambast me for referring to her as "she" and "her".  But we remain friends.
If I've learned anything on this wonderful Internet, it's this:  I don't have to approve of everything a person does or says, to be friends with them.  I believe I owe Xib (now Nachtkommen, if you AOL folks would like to check the profile) a big thank you for teaching me this lesson.  It's been a hard one for this old lady.

But I still think she's weird!


bnanajm said...

Mosie,  like you I sometimes wonder about her.  I will still refer to Xib as her and she can rail on me all she wants.  In my heart, I believe in time, she will realize she is a girl and celebrate that.

She has always been a friend to me and was kind when my dear sister passed away.  For that I will be thankful.

Thanks for adding her to your journal.



AKA Nanner

barbpinion said...

The greatest gift we can give one another is acceptance. *Barb*

sam7md2 said...

Thanks for sharing about Xib, Mo.  I've enjoyed chatting with her over the years too.  We don't have to approve of her, we just continue to love her and pray that someday God will be able to melt her heart to bring her to Himself.........Sam

ryanagi said...

Isn't it cool who you meet online?! I've met so many interesting people through AOL that I would NEVER cross paths with in my day to day life. Julian is quite a character! I hope he gets the surgery he wants some day.

toonguykc said...

Your friendship and acceptance may bery well influence this person in positive ways over the years to come.  Preaching seldom accomplishes that.

bookncoffee said...

She looks so sad and that makes me sad.
Nice of you to befriend her when others ignored.